A selection of Various Birds
Early Bird
All his life (15 minutes and counting since hatching), Jimmy had heard that “The early bird gets the worm.” He only had two questions: 1. How could he have gotten here any earlier, and 2. what are worms . . . ?
Fence Sitter
Christine had been pressured by her friends on both sides of the political spectrum, but finally registered as an independent–after all, she was good at fence sitting . . .
What?
“What?” asked Henry, “You want me to run for Governor in a blue state?”
All You Can Eat
Like most “all you can eat” buffets, the food was mediocre on a good day. That probably was yesterday, thought Ziggy. Today, the sunflower seeds were soft and soggy, left over from last night’s rain, the corn scarce and barely acceptable, and the sparrows had eaten all of those little seeds already. He thought he would try to do a new food channel TV show for birds, but finding a decent bird feeder these days was tough, and who liked watching or listening to someone who continually whined. . . ?
New Egret
The deal had been simple, Brian (large, brownish red) agreed to give Tiffany (small, white, yellow beak) a free ride and all the bugs she could eat, but clearly she wasn’t “Takin’ care of business”. For proof, he showed her his left shoulder and side. And he was tired of her snide remarks like “Don’t let it bug you” as well . . .
In the Red
When Chandler proposed to his girl friend, she told him she liked him but didn’t want to start life with someone already in the red. She reconsidered when he explained that he was red, not in the red, like the US government, the city of Detroit, and California . . .