When the East Glacier boys decided to get rich playing Fantasy Football, they hadn’t counted on the problem of converting buffalo chips (the only currency for bison in Glacier park and bison society in general) to a Visa or Amex card to pay on line . . .
Jack (pictured) had been a vegetarian all his life; in fact, his entire family had been vegans. But with the advent of streaming television on his iPhone and ongoing Burger King and Pizza Hut ads, Jack was beginning to have an unyielding craving for a little animal protein. The Chili’s ad for Baby Back Ribs put him over the top, he was going to go for the all you can eat option
Greg (pictured), though a high-mileage frequent flyer, was thinking about giving up flying; the invasive full body scan (who knew what long term danger that posed?) or the equally invasive pat down both seemed to be going way too far. He did wonder about the guy who told the TSA screener, “Don’t touch my junk;” Greg thought much more highly of his individual biological components than that
When The Princess Buttercup (AKA Polly Wolly Poodle All The Day) had agreed to let the stylist make her look “just like one of the Kardashians,” her hopes had been high. After “do” reflections, her hope gave way to doubt about the stylists claims . . .while lovely, it just wasn’t “Kardashian.”
Kermit (pictured), for privacy reasons, had been hesitant to submit to the full body scan; his friends told him that, in spite of promises from TSA that the images would be quickly destroyed and never shared or made public, Kermit would be on You Tube in minutes. And thus, Kermit, famous Sesame Street legend, was not at all surprised when minutes after landing at his destination he was texted with a link to YouTube featuring–yup, good ol’ Kermit in full color. His only question was, what would Lady Gaga have done?
It was open mic night at the Vulture Comedy Club, and Bruce (second from the left) started with “How do you tell the greedy vulture from the rest?” Answer: “He’s the one that goes from eating roadkill to being roadkill . . .”
