A selection of Various Birds
Hurricane Harvey Rescue Shelter
When Conrad told his friends all he wanted at the emergency shelter was the promised hot shower and a dry cot, they told him, “Don’t be gullible, there’s no birds allowed . . .”
Action Figure
Larry (pictured) had dithered long enough; it was time to propose to his longtime girlfriend and get the job done. His brother said that his new decisiveness made him a real action figure, yet Larry somehow had never figured himself as G. I. Joe or one of the Transformers. . .
Didn’t Happen
Alvin was disappointed; his spiritual adviser told him if he buried his head in the sand during the eclipse and prayed, he would win the Powerball jackpot. Didn’t happen . . .
Bird Umbrellas
Marc was quite surprised to have his patent application for “bird umbrellas” rejected on “functional usability” issues . . .
Breaking Ranks
Clarice knew doves were supposed to be vegan, but after eating two wasps and a dragonfly, she began wishing McDonald’s would offer the McRib sandwich again soon . . .
Failed Dye Job
When his “Ruby” throat didn’t get red as fast as he hoped, Benny tried the local hair stylist. It seems her vision of ruby isn’t just what Benny had in mind . . .