It’s a little known fact, but yes, Wal-Mart bought out Wonder Bread, and now the iconic loaf with a lot of air and a little flour, along with Twinkies, Ho Ho’s and Ding Dongs, are all made in China. As urban legend can attest, shelf life has never been a problem . . .
Eustace, in favor of returning to the gold standard, tried to get his congressman to introduce a bill that that would not only reinstate the gold standard but attach a rider stating that all goldfish should be weighed in Troy ounces. His congressman reminded him that all that glitters is not gold, and that was especially true for three for a dollar goldfish bought at Wal-Mart’s pet department . . .
Upon reflection, Linda Lou (in the brown car) decided she may have been a little overaggressive trying to be first in line for the heavily-discounted Wal-Mart flat screen TV. Turns out they did have more than one at the good price . . . Now, how would she get it home?
Lucinda was once again disappointed in the bogus claims made by cosmetic manufacturers–the new lipstick was supposed to be waterproof, kiss-proof,sweat-proof, even algae -proof. Clearly, this was going to require another trip to the Wal-Mart cosmetic section or customer service desk for a refund . . .
