Edgar was certain Al Gore was wrong–in fact he was part of the problem. Yes, global warming was a man made problem, but it wasn’t industry or autos that were the cause. The lift from rising thermals over areas where politicians spewed hot air–the White House, Congress, any Governor’s Mansion, any State House or mayor’s offices or city council chambers–was significantly better than the hot air over any industrial area or freeway during rush hour. . . . . David, Sf.G.
Like the Internet, Al Gore designed and invented the “Eye of London” and convinced the Londoners that soon Global Warming would make the River Thames rise, and the Eye could be used as a giant water wheel to generate electric power. In the meantime, the ride on the “Eye” was cheap (it was electric powered), but like Al’s Global Warming theories, didn’t seem to be going anywhere . . . . . David, Sf.G.
Gerry had been quite keen on the concept of alternative energy, that is, until he went to a seminar in downtown Houston sponsored by Al Gore, Lady Gaga and some illustrious professor from the University of Phoenix (on line). The argument for wind and solar energy was compelling until Al suggested Gerry mount solar panels on his wings to generate power as he cruised, and have a small wind turbine fitted to his beak to take advantage of the high wind speed as he dove. The question was, where was he supposed to put the batteries, because a cord sure wasn’t going to work? . . . . . David, Sf.G.
Everyone including Izzy (pictured) was happy with the new “Living Drone” raptor program with Homeland Security to guard borders and do other sensitive surveillance where camouflaging a drone to look like a raptor just wouldn’t work. Fitting Izzy and his buddies with a harness for FLIR (forward looking infrared radar) for operating when overcast or at night had been easy. Fitting the Hellfire missiles as originally planned, though, just wasn’t going to work. The only ones not happy were, of course, PETA, who thought that the raptors were being exploited (“all this dangerous flying for a few fish and meat scraps”), the ACLU, who thought it was illegal to have an eagle search without a warrant, and Al Gore, who thought the eagle–to be green–should be solar-powered . . . . . David, Sf.G.
While Al Gore’s new autobiography revealed many well-known facts about the innovator–such as inventing the Internet, inventing computer generated music (for his band, The AlGoreRhythms), inventing wind (actually, just channeling political rhetoric, the same thing)–he had one big regret. That was inventing oil, which he had intended only for lubricating wind and water powered equipment, but once the djinn was out of the bottle, well. . . . . David, Sf.G.
The turnout for the SXSW film festival in Austin drew the usual crowd of Glitterati–Cher, Al Gore and his band the AlGoreRhythms, Lady Gaga, Brad Pitt, Madonna, Angelina Jolie, Donald Trump, Michelle Obama–even Al Sharpton made it as a guest of Spike Lee, as did three Marilyn Monroe, four Elvis and one Richard Nixon look-alikes (oddly, no Michael Jackson look-alikes), but when Willie Nelson showed up (possibly under the influence of mind-altering substances) with his trumpet, and claimed that he was Miles Davis reincarnated, it was suggested that he “quit tooting his own horn”. . . . . David, Sf.G.