Pokémon Reject
Boudreaux was wild about Pokemon Go; he applied to be the newest Pokémon character, but was told Pokémon was short for Pocket Monster, and not even Texas had pockets that big . . .
Pending Civil Rights Lawsuit
Quincy’s offer to guard the ponds at Disney World was rejected–they said he might scare the children–His lawyer said they would file a discrimination lawsuit . . .
Snake Handling
Buttercup had read some rural Appalachian churches practiced snake handling and was curious, but decided it wasn’t for her . . .
Slip Sliding Away . . .
Kendall knew he was a Red-eared Slider, but he was trying to figure out the slider part–his 401K or his health . . .
MythBusters
Westley, trying to launch an online version of MythBusters, chose to check the urban myth that alligators had no tonsils . . .
Exfoliating
As part of the weekend spa package Jill had given herself after dumping her useless football-watching, beer-drinking boyfriend, she’d been told that the mud bath was good for exfoliating the dead skin and rejuvenating her dry, cracked, scaly skin, but she didn’t think it was working . . .