When some Montana residents were asked by the pollsters how their new Federally Mandated health insurance programs were working out compared to their previous health care plan, one said “Fair,” two refused to comment, while two showed their appreciation without uttering a word . . .
Trying to get into the swing of things in preparation for taking over his Uncle Phil’s job ( The weather forecasting ground hog from Pennsylvania) when the old guy retired, Bruce LaVerne, from upper Manhattan, NY NY, had gone to bed last fall for a good winter’s nap. Judging by the weather, either the President, Al Gore, Michael Moore and Madonna were right about global warming, or he had badly overslept . . .
Trying to stop the Ebola spread, and having identified the likely source as “bush meat,” the CDC and the UN’s WHO dispatched teams with big checkbooks to try to buy out the hunters co-op and finance raising pigs or sheep instead, only to find out they were too late. The co-op had already been shut down by a lawsuit from an American candy company claiming “trademark infringement”–seems the co-op had been marketing under the name of Rhesus Pieces . . .
Every morning, as the herd climbed up the slope to the grassy hillside to feed, Eunice (middle, skylined) would burst out with at best a fair version of “The hills are alive . . .” even though everyone was sick to death of that song, sung by anyone. Why couldn’t she change up to “Do You Know The Way To San Jose?,” “Satisfaction,” “Light My Fire”, “I’ve Got You Babe”, “Viva Las Vegas”, or even “I Was Born This Way”, or “The Hokey Pokey”–anything but “The Hills Are Alive . . .?”
Dierdre had gotten an auto generated e-mail from Target offering a free pair of the new camo Spanx with the purchase of two regular pairs. She thought the camo pair might come in handy during hunting season, and the hot pink or lime green could lead hunters to believe that she was really Nicki Minaj out for a walk in the heavily armed, hunter-infested woods and be hesitant to possibly shoot an international pop star . . .
Kent (middle, back row) had heard Bob Marley’s song “Buffalo Soldiers” and was inspired. He cajoled and bullied his homies to go to the recruiting station and enlist, only to be told they couldn’t–how were they going to hold a rifle? The enlistment officer did suggest they try out as free agents for the NFL; they would make great defensive linebackers . . .
