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Homer had thought that putting out his web in the cold (for the Texas Gulf Coast) winter while all the other spiders stayed at home would mean no competition, and he was right. Sadly, all of the bugs also stayed in--slim pickings . . .
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Gary (pictured) had had a tough night; first he heard that wrestling was fake, then that Lady Gaga was really a guy, that Oprah was retiring, and that Michael Jackson wasn't really dead but doing charity work in Haiti. The final straw had been the news report that Mike Pence had run off with Madonna and been elected to be prime minister of Israel. It seemed as though he was living in a web of deceit . . .
Fear of Heights
When her job at General Motors was eliminated shortly before her retirement, Josie (pictured) had no income and no pension. In her wildest dreams she had never thought about becoming a circus performer; she had a distinct fear of heights. But here she was, doing the high wire act with no safety net, which, as she thought about it, wasn’t all that different from the outcome of her job at GM. . .
Center of the Universe
Cynthia, in spite of what her boyfriend told her, was convinced that she was at the center of the universe. At least as she saw it . . .
Disorderly
Julianna was so nervous–her new mate was supposed to be here in less than an hour and the house was in complete disorder . . .
Not a Fixit Guy
In spite of his best efforts, Janine’s husband, as a fixit guy, was a train wreck waiting to happen. She had just gotten that hole in the web fixed, and now he “fixed” it again . . .