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Sheila (pictured) had been a Texas congresswoman for three terms and was getting ready to settle in for her fourth term, but she was concerned by an unusually close race; in fact, she was nearly unseated by a write in candidate that didn't represent either party that anybody had ever heard of before. Her concern was the mantra picked up by the pundits and the political blogs saying that her voting record had been spottier than her white and brown coat, and the longhorn thing was just plain reaching . . .
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When Mrs. Bondurant, the civics teacher, asked each of the freshman students what part in government they would like to be, Henry quickly said, "Speaker of the House." He had every hope that he'd be able to tame those pesky feathers on top of his head--after all, in politics, looking the part was as important as substance.
Going It Alone
Patti (pictured) had been one half of the Purple Passion comedy team. They had done well on the casino circuit, especially Las Vegas, but her partner, Paul, had become very polarized politically and could only make jokes about the President and Congress. After the third visit from the FBI and two from the Secret Service, she decided to go it alone. The headlines of the tabloids in the grocery store provided more than enough to get laughs . . .
Black Ops Project
Unknown to the public, a Congress-mandated “Black Ops Project” had been funded to convert flowers to secret radar dishes to track the flood of drones operating and to sort out the harmless hobbyists from terrorists . . .
Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
Purrrfect, the cat, wondered why sleeping dogs got to lie (with no penalty) and how they could lie if they were really sleeping. Did that mean politicians who lie before Congress invoked the “Sleeping Dog Clause . . .”?
Networking Guy
When Glenn heard that the heir presumptive to the Speaker job had bowed out and that you didn’t have to be a congressman to be Speaker, he immediately sent his resume. He was the ultimate networking guy, and that should prove valuable. When turned down, he blamed it on “arachnophobia.”